Sometimes I tuck my knees up into my chest and lean forward.
That’s just the way I roll.
I was having an argument with my wife last night and she accused me of being childish.
What does she know?
She’s just a stinky poo face…
Why didn’t the teddy bear eat his dessert?
Because he was stuffed.
I had a happy childhood, my dad used to put me inside a tire and roll me down a hill…
They were Goodyears.
My wife just told me to grow up.
To be fair though, it’s pretty hard to say anything with 37 gummy bears in your mouth.
Two dogs are sitting in a bar.
The first says, “Wanna hear a joke?”
The second dog says, “Sure!”
The first dog says, “Knock knock.”
The second says… “WOOF WOOF WOOF! WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF!!”
I tried to explain to my 4 year old son that’s it’s perfectly normal to poop your pants.
He’s still making fun of me though.
Check this one out: 1
To the person who hid my shoes while I was on the bouncy castle!…
Who hides in the bathroom at parties?
The condition of the man who was mauled at the Teddy bear’s picnic is said to be improving but he’s not out of the woods yet!
They say childbirth is the most painful thing someone can experience.
Maybe I was too young to remember, but I don’t think it hurt that much
I enjoyed my first time ever bobbing up and down in the sea yesterday…
It’s been my dream ever since I was a little buoy…
A kid asks his dad, “Do trees poop?”
The dad answers, “Where do you think number 2 pencils come from.”
I have a lot of growing up to do.
I realized that the other day in my fort.
Anyone want to swap some bum jokes?
I’ve got piles.
What do you call an ox with a large bum?
Look, I’m all for colouring books …
That’s where I draw the line.
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