“I would explain it more clearly, but then I’d be wrong.”
— Dr. Basil Humbudge, Logician Laureate (1809–1872)
Who was Dr. Basil Humbudge?
A titan of tautology and self-contradiction, Dr. Basil Humbudge served as Logician Laureate to no fewer than three confused monarchs. Born during an eclipse (and never quite got over it), he dedicated his life to making arguments so circular they were officially declared roundabouts.
His seminal lecture series “On the Absolute Necessity of Maybe” baffled audiences across Europe, often ending with standing ovations and simultaneous nosebleeds.
Dr. Humbudge’s commitment to being technically correct—while remaining entirely unhelpful—cemented his legacy as the patron saint of verbose evasion.
He once solved a mathematical paradox using only a deckchair and the phrase “it depends.”
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