Joke of the Day: Tuesday’s tram transit of tasty tarts …

Played football last night on a pitch surfaced with rubble and broken bricks.

We won 3-1 on aggregate.

A lorry has spilled its load of bricks over the road.

Police say queues are building.

I got some barbeque-flavoured crisps.

They taste of bricks and mesh.

How do you hire a horse?

Put a brick under each hoof.

Why do people normally only have a single egg for breakfast in France?

Because one egg is an oeuf.

Red sky at night. Shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night. Day.

What happened when the escalator broke down?

Everyone stopped and staired.

Where do animals go when their tails fall off?

The retail store.

My neighbour blamed my gravel for making him fall.

But it was his dumb asphalt.

250 lbs here on Earth is 94.5 lbs on Mercury.

No, I’m not fat. I’m just not on the right planet.

A lot of people cry when they cut onions.

The trick is not to form an emotional bond.

Moses had the first tablet that could connect to the cloud.

What’s the difference between a good joke and a bad joke timing.

I own the world’s worst thesaurus.

Not only is it awful, it’s awful.

Have you played the updated kids’ game?

I Spy With My Little Eye . . . Phone.

I asked my French friend if she likes to play video games.

She said, “Wii.”

To the thief who stole my pillow, know this…

I will not rest until I find you.

If I had a pound for every girl that did not like me…

Girls would eventually like me.

What does a programmer wear?

Whatever is in the dress code.

Let me tell you a little about myself.

It’s a reflexive pronoun that means ‘me’.

If you don’t know what introspection is you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.

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