Where are dead computer hackers buried?
I saw an ad for burial plots and thought to myself this is the last thing I need.
At weddings, old people always poke me and say you’ll be next!
It’s so annoying!… so.. I’ve started doing the same to them at funerals.
I was at a funeral the other day and a couple in front of me were loudly arguing about which herb goes best with which fish.
I could only think it wasn’t the Thyme or Plaice.
I went to my boss’s funeral …
I kneeled down next to the coffin and whispered, “Who is thinking outside the box now?”
I don’t like how funerals are usually between 9-11am.
I’m not really a mourning person.
As a funeral director, I tie the shoelaces together of the deceased.
Because if there was ever a zombie apocalypse, it would be hilarious.
“I’m sorry” and “I apologize ” mean the same thing …
Except at a funeral
The man who invented the word search has died.
His funeral will be held next…
T T I S P V G K M P H J G U O N Q U X N M O N D A Y W Z B A T K T E N O P G H C V N K O T D I M
Guy who owned Odeon cinemas has died.
His funeral is on Monday @ 2:10, 4:20 & 8:40
The guy who invented throat lozenges died last week.
There was no coffin at the funeral.
Before I die I am going to eat a whole bag of unpopped popcorn.
That should make the cremation a little more interesting.
Thank you for reading my writings. If you’d like to, you can buy me a coffee for just £1 and I will think of you while writing my next post! Just hit the link below…. (thanks in advance)