Clever Maths Jokes Collection for Number Enthusiasts | Math Mirth

Welcome to Math Mirth, your go-to site for clever and witty maths jokes! Whether you’re a number enthusiast or just love a good pun, our collection of maths humour is sure to tickle your funny bone. From algebraic antics to geometric gags, we’ve got jokes that add up to a lot of laughs. Dive in and discover the lighter side of mathematics!

Atheists don’t solve exponential equations because they don’t believe in higher powers.

If the number 666 is considered evil…

Is 25.8069758 the root of all evil?

I collected a lot of data trying to disprove observation bias.

The results were exactly as I expected.

I asked my German friend if he knew the square root of 81.

He said “No”.

I once tried to quickly make a square but I ended up with an octagon…

That’s what happens when you cut corners.

Did you hear about the mathematician who was afraid of negative numbers?

He would stop at nothing to avoid them.

My geometry teacher has lost his parrot.

Polygon.

I used to be a big Robbie Williams fan but that all changed when I started to study geometry and found that more interesting.

I’m loving angles instead…

I had a threesome with a scalene and an isosceles.

It was a love triangle.

My maths teacher called me average.

How mean!

What do you get if you divide 22 sheep into 7 pens?

A shepherd’s pi…

3.14% of sailors are Pi Rates.

Why didn’t 4 ask out 5?

Because he was 2².

6 was scared of 7 because 7, 8, 9 but why did 7 eat 9?

Because you’re supposed to eat 3 squared meals a day.

If Dave has 50 chocolate bars and eats 45, what does he have left?

Diabetes. Dave has diabetes.

I was in a shop the other day, and they put the heating on full blast.

I complained to the manager ‘It’s over 90 degrees in here’

He said ‘Stop being so obtuse!’

Why is it that so many Kings are named after fractions?

I, for one, like Roman numerals.

95% of people are idiots. I’m glad I’m in the other 15%.

There’s a thin line between a numerator and a denominator.

Only a fraction of people will find this funny.

Mental maths.

It’s the thought that counts.

I asked my dog what’s two minus two.

He said nothing.

I’ve just seen an advert in my local newspaper. ACCOUNTANT NEEDED! £35,000 – £40,000

So I rang them and said, “The answer is -£5,000”

7/5th of all people do not understand fractions.

There are only 10 kinds of people that understand binary – those that do, and those that don’t.

f(x)=2×1 walks into a bar.

The barman says, “Sorry, we don’t cater for functions”.

If I got 50 pence for every math exam I failed…

I’d have £7.35 now.

Not all maths puns are bad. Just sum

My wife said she would leave me because of my obsession with algebra.

Now she is my X.

I know a mathematician who can’t afford lunch.

He’s binomial.

I challenged the number 1 to a fight, but he brought his friends 3, 5, 7, and 9.

The odds were against me.

I’ve decided to become a maths teacher, but I’m only going to teach subtraction.

I just want to make a difference.

We all know Albert Einstein was a genius…

But his brother Frank was a monster.

I just broke up with my mathematician wife.

She was still obsessed with her x.

Maths and alcohol don’t mix.

Please don’t drink and derive.

Why do math teachers make good dancers?

Because they have algorithm.

Never discuss infinity with a mathematician.

If 2×2 makes 4, and 3×3 makes 9, how come 0x0 makes gravy?

I know every single digit of pi.

Just not in the right order.

My stats professor told me that the larger the sample size, the more trustworthy the data.

I guess the N’s justify the means.

Bit nervous about my maths exam.

Think my chances of passing it are 40-40.

Got stopped by customs with a calculator, an exercise book, and a slide rule.

Apparently, they’re instruments of maths instruction.

I wear glasses during maths because it improves division.

Improper Fraction Helpdesk.

Now open 24/7

When I eat a rack of ribs I only eat ribs 2, 3, 5, 7 and 11

I prefer prime ribs.

I ordered some Avocado Toast at a cafe, but imagine my surprise when I was given 602214076000000000000000 pieces of toast.

It was then I realized…

I’d accidentally ordered Avogadro’s Toast.

Math puns are the first sine of madness.

Without geometry, life is pointless.

If a male mathematician sunbathes outside a lot, are they a real tan gent?

What did the mermaid wear to math class?

An algae-bra.

I got thrown out of math class for one too many infractions.

Mathematicians are sum worshippers.

I did so much geometry study today that I’m exhausted.

I’m all out of shape.

Did you now that mathematicians are always reluctant to cosine a loan?

How do deaf mathematicians communicate?

Through sine language.

Old mathematicians never die.

They just disintegrate.

Why did the mathematician work at home?

Because he could only function in his domain.

Did you hear what happened to the mathematician who couldn’t stop adding up, until it finally all got too much for him?

He had an incremental breakdown.

I used to hate math until I realised that decimals have a point.

Why is advanced geometry class boring?

Because it’s full of squares.

What did the arrogant math teacher do when he was wrong?

He ate a slice of humble pi.

When math teachers retire, how do they cope with the aftermath?

I’m struggling in math class.

It just feels like we’re going in circles.

Why should you wear glasses during math class?

It improves division.

What do organic mathematicians throw on their fire?

Natural logs.

I don’t really like math, but I’m partial to fractions.

I tried studying negative numbers but I became nonplussed.

What happens to mathematicians who don’t practise safe sex?

They get binarial disease.

I read a math book the other day.

To be honest, I thought a lot of it was rather derivative.

Can bad mathematicians not count on their friends?

I should never have become a math teacher.

It was a miscalculated move.

Why will we never run out of math teachers?

Because they always multiply.

And that’s not all …..

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Published by The Sage Page

Philosopher

4 thoughts on “Clever Maths Jokes Collection for Number Enthusiasts | Math Mirth

  1. As a proto-nerd I appreciate the cleverness but maths isn’t so funny for me. I blame my old maths teacher who once described me as “a barnacle on the ship of progress “. 

    He was a square who regressed to the mean and also an imagination number.

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      1. You were stuffed. It’s an integral part of maths.

        Btw, that’s where the wheels fell off for me. Square root of -1 ? That’s bullshit ! You can’t do that, said I. It’s imaginary. Sure and Mickey mouse is an actual mouse.

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      2. We all know that the square root of minus one is represented by the imaginary unit, denoted as “i” in mathematics. So, the square root of minus one is equal to “i”, which means it is all about u.

        Why did the imaginary number break up with the number line?

        Because it couldn’t handle the square roots of its problems! Now it’s just feeling “i-rational” ….

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