I can’t get enough minimalism I was born to be a pessimist. My blood type is B Negative. I met my girlfriend at an arthritis support group…you know when two people just click? 6:30 is definitely the best time on a clock… Hands down. The doctor gave me 4 months to live, so I shotContinue reading “Joke of the Day: Thursday’s thin throng of three thirsty thoughtless therapists …”
Author Archives: The Sage Page
The Sage raps in the hood
(Verse 1)In the heart of the hood, where the stories unfold,There’s a man with a presence, worth more than gold,White hair, white beard, in a robe so bright,He’s the wisest man around, shining in the night. With eyes that have witnessed a thousand sunsets,He’s seen it all, no need to place your bets,He’s walked throughContinue reading “The Sage raps in the hood”
Joke of the Day: Tuesday’s taught torniquet of tattered twine …
My friend was sent to prison last year for excessive burping. He’s finally been let out with a pardon. 2,000 mockingbirds = 2 kilomockingbirds Saw my ex-girlfriend at the bank today, not good news!! I was hoping she’d wash further downriver. I went for a job interview today. The interviewer said to me, “What wouldContinue reading “Joke of the Day: Tuesday’s taught torniquet of tattered twine …”
Joke of the Day: Monday’s make-up magnum of manky mascara ….
Whenever I eat eggs benedict it reminds me of the time I lived in the Netherlands… Those were my Holland days… My wife wants to apply for a job as a steamroller driver. I promised her I won’t stand in her way. I gave myself a prostate exam earlier. That’s the last time I buyContinue reading “Joke of the Day: Monday’s make-up magnum of manky mascara ….”
This Day in History: September 10th
Certainly! Here are 10 interesting historical events that took place on September 10th: These events span a wide range of historical periods and significance, highlighting the diversity of occurrences on September 10th throughout history. Thank you for reading my writings. If you’d like to, you can buy me a coffee for just £1 and IContinue reading “This Day in History: September 10th”
Joke of the Day: Friday’s feeble fountain of freudian fish food ….
Archaeologists in Egypt have discovered a pyramid covered in chocolate and hazelnuts. It’s believed to be the tomb of Pharaoh Rocher. Opened a mars bar once. Discovered martians love gin. I made some jerk chicken today. He didn’t even say thank you. What do you call a chicken in a shell suit? An egg. IContinue reading “Joke of the Day: Friday’s feeble fountain of freudian fish food ….”
This Day in History: September 8th
Here are 10 interesting historical events that took place on September 8th: These events cover a wide range of historical periods and significance, showcasing the diversity of occurrences on September 8th throughout history. Thank you for reading my writings. If you’d like to, you can buy me a coffee for just £1 and I willContinue reading “This Day in History: September 8th”
Advice of the Day: Jigsaw Puzzles
Why pay the earth for expensive jigsaws? Just take a bag of frozen chips from the freezer and try piecing together potatoes. The advice to use frozen chips (french fries) as a substitute for expensive jigsaw puzzles is likely meant as humor or a playful suggestion rather than practical advice. Attempting to piece together frozenContinue reading “Advice of the Day: Jigsaw Puzzles”
Advice of the Day: Nail Clippings
APPLY red nail varnish to your nails before clipping them. The red nails will be much easier to spot on your bathroom carpet. (Unless you have a red carpet, in which case a contrasting varnish should be selected) The advice to apply red nail varnish to your nails before clipping them and mentioning a contrastingContinue reading “Advice of the Day: Nail Clippings”
Joke of the Day: Friday’s fortuitous fable of frankly fictional figures ….
I want to give up being a postman to become a comedian, but my delivery is awful. Someone I know has got a job writing a new dictionary. I’ve asked him to put a word in for me. I got a new job as a chiropodist and found the first day really difficult. I guessContinue reading “Joke of the Day: Friday’s fortuitous fable of frankly fictional figures ….”
The Sage Page 