Joke of the Day: Bees and Wasps

What type of bees produce milk?

Boobees.

Why do bees stay in their hives during winter?

Swarm.

When a new hive is finished bees have a house swarming party.

News just in: Local police have acquired 1,000 bees.

They’re believed to be used as part of a sting operation.

Did you know that bees are actually allergic to pollen?

They break out in hives.

I love being covered in snot and honey.

It’s the bees’ sneeze.

When Noah wanted to check how many bees he had, he had a look in the arc hives.

Was a bit worried, I thought I was stung by a suspicious Russian wasp yesterday…

Turned out it was a only cagey bee…

I had a vinyl album called “Wasp Noises”, but when I played the first track it didn’t sound like a wasp and the second track didn’t sound like a wasp either…

Then I realised I was playing the B side…

What do you call a bee with messy hair?

A Frizz-bee.

What goes zzub-zubb when it travels?

A bee flying backwards.

What do unionized bees ask for?

More honey and shorter working flowers.

If there’s a bee in my hand, what’s in my eye?

Beauty.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

What is the last thing to go through a bee’s mind when it hits a windshield?

Its stinger.

A man who went into a pet shop and said “I’d like to buy a bee please.”

“A bee? we don’t sell bees.”

“Well you’ve got one in your window … “

What’s a bee use to style her hair?

Her honey comb, of course.

What’s a Bear without an ear?

A B, I guess.

What did the Ford say to the wasp?

That MUSTANG

I didn’t exactly ace my “capture the wasp” exam.

I got a bee.

In my school play, I played the back half of a wasp.

I thought I was the bee’s knees.

So wasps aren’t bees, but they look like bees.

They’re wanna-bees.

Why are wasps nastier than bees?

Because they can’t beehive

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