Joke of the Day: History

Need to find out the cost of buying one of those Elizabethan circular neck garments for a fancy dress party.

Can anyone give me a ruff estimate?

What do you call your average ancient Greek?

Mediocrates.

100 years ago everyone had a horse and only the rich had cars.

Nowadays everyone has a car and only the rich have horses.

Oh how the stables have turned…

Lance is an uncommon name these days, however in medieval times people were named Lance a lot…

Robber: “Give me all your money or you are GEOGRAPHY!’

Cashier (puzzled) “Did you mean to say “or you’re history?”

Robber: “Don’t change the subject.”

I failed my Greek mythology exam last week…

I think my lack of revision was my Achilles elbow.

I’m fed up with vegetarians interrogating me about my eating habits…

It’s like the spinach inquisition!

Who was King Arthur’s alcoholic knight?

Sir Ohsis of the Liver.

The Bayeux Tapestry isn’t an accurate historical record at all.

The whole thing was embroidered…

My ex-wife is standing at the opposite end of the museum from me!

I want to say hello but there’s just too much history between us.

The Ancient Egyptians were good at building – but only up to a point…

Saw a sign in a cafe that said they serve breakfast at any time.

I asked for a bacon sandwich during the Industrial Revolution.

I went to a pub called ‘The Light Brigade’ recently.

They certainly knew how to charge.

Archaeologists in Egypt have discovered a pyramid covered in chocolate and hazelnuts. It’s believed to be the tomb of Pharaoh Rocher.

Thank you for reading my writings. If you’d like to, you can buy me a coffee for just £1 and I will think of you while writing my next post! Just hit the link below…. (thanks in advance)

Published by The Sage Page

Philosopher

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