“Never hold a dust buster and a cat at the same time.”
The sage
The Sage has seen many catastrophes in his long life — exploding teapots, collapsing deckchairs, and that one unforgettable incident with a runaway wheelbarrow. But nothing, he insists, compares to the fury unleashed when you combine suction technology with an unsuspecting cat. Today’s advice is therefore delivered with both urgency and a faint smell of antiseptic: “Never hold a dust buster and a cat at the same time.”
According to The Sage, a cat’s relationship with noise is delicate and easily disrupted. A single buzz, whirr, or faint mechanical hum can turn even the laziest feline into a spiralling tornado of claws, indignation, and airborne regret. Holding the cat while holding the dust buster is essentially volunteering to become a scratching post with a pulse.
The Sage’s recommended protocol is simple: put one down. Any one. He doesn’t care which — just don’t try to juggle both unless your tetanus shots are up to date and your will is in order. Some advice saves time. Some saves money. This one saves blood.
Thank you for reading my writings. If you’d like to, you can buy me a coffee for just £1 and I will think of you while writing my next post! Just hit the link below…. (thanks in advance)
The Sage Page 