“If you get caught sleeping on the job, just raise your head and say — ‘In Jesus’ name, Amen!’”
The Sage has never been a stranger to the gentle art of sleeping in inconvenient places — fields, libraries, important council meetings — but even he admits that dozing off at work requires strategy. His solution is divinely inspired: “If you get caught sleeping on the job, just raise your head and say — ‘In Jesus’ name, Amen!’”
According to The Sage, this technique transforms any accidental nap into an impromptu moment of spiritual reflection. What looks like snoring becomes “deep meditation.” Drool becomes “holy water.” And that jerk awake when your neck gives out? Why, that’s the Spirit moving through you. It’s a flawless defence, particularly in workplaces that haven’t had a proper HR department since 1998.
Still, The Sage warns that this technique should be used sparingly. Too many “Amens” in one day and people may begin to suspect something. His rule of thumb: if your boss looks confused, you’re safe; if your boss starts praying with you, immediately pretend you’ve had a vision about being allowed to go home early.
Thank you for reading my writings. If you’d like to, you can buy me a coffee for just £1 and I will think of you while writing my next post! Just hit the link below…. (thanks in advance)
The Sage Page 