After kissing a girl on her sofa she said, “Let’s take this upstairs.”
“Okay” I said, ” You grab one end and I’ll grab the other.”
How can you tell the difference between an Indian and African elephant?
One of them is an elephant.
I was crossing the street when I suddenly noticed my ex getting run over by a bus.
I thought to myself, “Wow! That could have been me!”
Then I remembered I can’t drive a bus.
OK, so “Naked Running” apparently means; no music, no watch, no GPS, no electronics…
Would have been nice to have known that an hour ago!
My mom is a hoarder and refuses to throw out her old magazine collection.
She has a lot of issues.
Today I learned Albert Einstein really existed.
I thought he was a theoretical physicist.