I have decided that from the start of next week I am going to dress as a different kind of bread every day.
Roll on Monday!
Don’t talk to me about stealing clothes from washing lines…
I’ve been there, done that, got the t-shirt…
My girlfriend has just fell over and dropped a basket full of freshly ironed clothes.
I just sat back and watched it all unfold!
I’ve got very sensitive teeth.
They’ll probably be upset I’ve told you.
I left my last girlfriend because she wouldn’t stop counting.
I wonder what she’s up to now…
I was at a job interview today.
The interviewer said to me, “On your CV, it says that you’re a man of mystery.”
I said, “That’s correct.”
He said, “Would you like to elaborate?”
I said, “No.”
I backed horse last week at ten to one.
It came in at quarter past four.
Last year Sir Paul McCartney was disqualified from The London Marathon.
He was banned on the run…
BREAKING NEWS !!
Police hunting a robber who stole a book about Stradivarius have warned the public not to approach him…
He has a history of violins…
I reckon I’m a wanted man for using too much coconut shampoo…
It’s like there’s a bounty on my head…
What do you call a Welshman with a biscuit on his head?
Dai Gestive.
The Sage Page 