Never lose your TV remote again by attaching it to a broom handle and carrying it everywhere like a ceremonial staff.
the sage
The television remote has a mysterious ability to vanish the moment you need it most. It slips into sofa cushions, disappears under furniture, and occasionally enters what science can only describe as another dimension. The Wise Sage believes the answer is simple: make it physically impossible to ignore.
By firmly taping the remote to the end of a broom handle, you create both a practical locating system and an object of great personal authority. No longer a small plastic inconvenience, your remote becomes a noble staff of entertainment control, visible from anywhere in the house and impossible to accidentally sit on.
For added security, the Sage recommends decorating the handle with ribbons or small bells. This ensures that every channel change is accompanied by a sense of ceremony and a faint jingling noise, which also helps with location during moments of panic.
If guests question why you are entering the lounge carrying what appears to be a wizard’s sceptre with batteries, simply say, “I take television seriously.”
As always, The Sage accepts no responsibility for damaged lampshades, accidental poking, or becoming far too emotionally attached to your remote staff.
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