Tuesday’s tree trunk of truffles ….

Feeling lazy? … why not listen instead!

Cowboys don’t roll joints.

They tumble weed.

What do you say to your sister when she’s crying?

Are you having a crisis?

And the award for best neck wear goes to…

Well would you look at that!, it’s a tie!

For our chemistry exam we had to write a thousand words on acid.

Unfortunately my pen turned into a gorilla and the floor melted.

My friend keeps saying, “cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water.”

I know he means well.

I start a new job in Seoul next week.

I thought it was a good Korea move.

I’m not a complete idiot – several parts are missing.

Went to an ABBA theme pub last night.

The toilets were amazing!.

What a loo…!!

A priest, a rabbit and a minister walked into a bar.

The rabbit says “I think I might be a typo…”

I surprised my wife by getting romantic last night…

Best Scrabble score I’ve ever had…

Feeling a bit fed up and been comfort eating all day…

Now my breath smells of fabric conditioner.

I came home drunk last night and didn’t want to wake anyone up so I just stuck two French pancakes to my feet and crêped up the stairs…

Knowing how to pick locks has really opened a lot of doors for me.

It’s raining cats and dogs out there.

I know, I just stepped in a poodle.

Published by The Sage Page


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