ADVICE OF THE DAY
Save on electricity — by sleeping during daylight hours!
That way, you’ll never have to turn the lights on… or face the neighbours.
Ever the master of practical nonsense, The Sage today turns his attention to the rising cost of energy. While lesser mortals switch tariffs, install smart meters, or argue with customer service bots, The Sage has discovered a truly revolutionary method: simply rearrange your existence. Sleep through the day like a particularly thrifty owl, and rise at dusk to do your living under the generous glow of street lamps and moonlight — both entirely free!
Of course, there are minor inconveniences. The post office will be shut, the shops will be closed, and your friends may grow suspicious of your new “night-based lifestyle.” But The Sage insists these are small sacrifices on the path to enlightenment (and a smaller electric bill). The real benefit, he notes, is spiritual: “You can’t be distracted by daylight when there isn’t any.”
In the grand tradition of The Sage’s wisdom, today’s advice blends a curious mixture of logic and lunacy — a perfect reminder that the pursuit of thrift often leads one down the dimly lit alleyways of absurdity. Still, as The Sage would say: “A penny saved is a sunrise avoided.”
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