A selection of British Jokes for Monday. I hope you enjoy them!
Tag Archives: Humour
Friday Funnies!
A selection of Jokes to lift your spirits and help you get to the weekend!
Thursday Funnies!
A coworker named Celsius recently retired at my work, so they hired a guy named Kelvin to replace him. He’s the new temp. Me: licking lips in anticipation I’m nervous. I’ve never done a bungee jump before. Instructor: don’t lick my lips again. My Himalayan friend has a cow that refuses to stand up. IContinue reading “Thursday Funnies!”
Wednesday Jokes!
Some Jokes for Wednesday.
I hope you enjoy them.
Tuesday Jokes!
Today’s Jokes ….
Monday Mirth!
If I had a pound for every time a customer complained about the price of cinema food… I could almost afford a small popcorn. What’s the friendliest polyatomic ion? Bromate. A clown has been sacked for turning up late for his job at the circus. He is suing for funfair dismissal. A dentist and aContinue reading “Monday Mirth!”
Friday Funnies!
I’m putting back together my band called ‘Bubble Wrap’. All we do is pop… I wasn’t expecting the pizza delivery guy to turn up tonight wearing a Gloria Gaynor face mask! At first I was afraid… During the recent toilet paper shortage I had to resort to using a calendar to wipe with… I’m gladContinue reading “Friday Funnies!”
Thursday Funnies!
I just wrote a book on reverse psychology… Don’t buy it! Someone called me pretentious the other day. I nearly choked on my latte. My mate dug a hole in the garden and filled it with water…. I think he meant well. My wife said to me “There’s 14 reasons why I’m leaving you, andContinue reading “Thursday Funnies!”
Wednesday Jokes!
I hate jokes that rely on visual imagery. I’ve had it right up to here with them. I asked the hotel receptionist for a wake-up call. She rang me room and said, “What the hell are you doing with your life?” I asked my grandmother for “something Cuban” for my birthday, and she got meContinue reading “Wednesday Jokes!”
Tuesday Quips
I went to the doctor. I said to him ‘I’m frightened of lapels.’ He said, ‘You’ve got cholera.’ I met the bloke who invented crosswords today. I can’t remember his name, its P something T something R. Once formed a band called the Sewing Machines.. Didn’t work out.. Couldn’t get a Singer … FUN FACTContinue reading “Tuesday Quips”
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